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"Still. Little young, don't you think?"
"He's an old soul, okay?" Tony scowled.
"Well, since your soul's about five, I guess that works."
"If you're going to be an ass, I'm not going to talk about this—"
"Alright, alright. What's the old soul's name?"
Tony just made a complaining sort of groan in response. He let his head fall forward, eventually mumbling into the worktable, "His name is Steve."
"So what's he like?" Rhodey persisted, then, on second thought, "But stick to the clean stuff. I need to be way drunker than I am now for your sex stories."
"No sex to tell." Tony admitted into the table.
He didn't need to see Rhodey to know his eyebrows had just shot up to his hairline.
"Oh?" was all Rhodey said, but it was the smuggest 'oh' Tony had ever heard.
"Fuck off."
"So it's serious, then."
"…" Tony raised his head at last, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Theoretically."
"Oh my god."
"Rhodey, if you're going to be an asshole about this, I'm not going to tell you things anymore—"
"You're not even dating?"
"I have never wanted to punch you more. I hope you know that."
"You gotta let me meet this guy."
"Not on your life."
"Give me your phone."
"Fuck no—"
"Aw, I bet you save his texts and everything—"
"I am seriously considering setting you on fire and blaming it on a suit malfunction."
"You do—"
"Not on purpose!"
"How is it an accident?"
"I click delete and JARVIS says 'are you certain you wish to delete the entire history of your friendship with Steve' because he's an asshole and then I can't click yes after that—"
"Only you would invent a robot capable of becoming invested in your relationships."
"Both accounts are incorrect." JARVIS intervened. "I am incapable of investment or being an 'asshole'. However, all available data points to user Steve Robinson having the most positive effect on sir of anything or anyone I have noted to date. Sir eats healthier, sleeps more, works less, and is, by all human definitions, happier. As my primary coding is to ensure sir's wellbeing, I am all but required to encourage further interaction."
A silence stretched between them as Rhodey stared at Tony knowingly.
"So basically, your robot butler ships it."
Tony let his head hit the table again with a loud thunk.
Steve was utterly exhausted.
He hadn't slept at all during the mission, and between losing Thor—to another realm, no less—taking a red-eye flight back, and now sitting through a seemingly endless meeting, he'd certainly seen better days.
He understood the importance of the meeting, of course. Apparently while he and Clint had been gone, Tony had finished the War Machine armor. Steve had been a bit disappointed by that at first, since he'd been sort of guiltily hoping to "meet" Tony as Captain America, before Nick explained that Tony would still be around headquarters every Tuesday and Thursday for upgrades and consulting on other things, like improving the quinjets and assisting on the Helicarrier project. It meant being in full uniform all day every Tuesday and Thursday because Tony didn't really keep set hours, but Steve didn't mind if it meant he'd get a chance to bump into him and see Tony's reaction to Captain America.
In the meantime, he and Clint met with Lieutenant Colonel James Rhodes, Tony's long-time friend and chosen pilot. Nick gave Colonel Rhodes a quick briefing on their double identities at Midtown High so he knew not to blow their covers, before moving on to the team training he had planned for them. Though Nick moved on, Steve found he couldn't focus.
Probably because Colonel Rhodes kept staring at him.
He'd thought maybe hero worship at first—military men seemed particularly prone to it—but unless he was so tired he was getting paranoid—also a possibility—there was a very distinctly disapproving edge to it. He couldn't understand it; the Colonel had been nothing but pleasant when they'd first shaken hands.
Eventually Steve forgot about it in lieu of texting Tony under the table, though. He had to get through this meeting, and he could use a hot shower, but then all he wanted to do was fall asleep on Tony's couch, letting the dramatic movie music and smell of popcorn and soothing babble of Tony's chatter send him off to sleep.
Not to mention, most of his stuff was at Tony's place.
Part of it was that he'd had so little "stuff" to begin with. Also, it was just so much more convenient. They watched movies late into the night more often than not, and over the past month and a half since that first movie night, he'd just sort of…inched in. He hadn't meant to. He hadn't even realized it had happened, not until just last week when he'd woken up in his quarters and felt extremely disoriented for a long moment, before figuring out that he wasn't used to waking up without Tony slumped against his shoulder. Then he'd gone to get ready, only to discover he didn't have a backup toothbrush, and his was at Tony's.
Steve was going to have to buy another toothbrush, among other things, but if it meant he could stretch out this strange limbo of half-living with Tony a little longer, he didn't mind in the least. Tony's place felt a lot closer to a home than his quarters at SHIELD ever had.
Hey, I'm back in town. You still awake?
Do I ever sleep?
I don't think you've ever made it to the end of a movie.
I definitely have.
You definitely have not.
Lies, Robinson.
You know me, nothing but a dirty liar.
I just inhaled coffee through my nose.
